You Messed With The Wrong Lawyer!
by DeraldSny
Summary: When one of Rei Ryght's cases runs afoul of the local mafia, they kidnap her boss to ensure her co-operation... they really should have known better.


Here's a one-shot from me, set in the same continuity as 'Rei Ryghts: Ace Attorney', taking place shortly after the events of the story. Hope you enjoy it!

You Messed With The Wrong Lawyer!

A Hyperdimension Neptunia Fan Fiction

By Derald Snyder

 _August 2, 2:06 PM_

 _Samson & Co. Law Offices_

Rei Ryghts frowned as she looked over the witness statements from her latest case, her brow furrowed... It had seemed like such a simple case at first. Her client, Silas Cape the goat farmer, had been accused of killing Victor Timmons with his shotgun in an alley. The prosecution's argument had been that Cape was well known for his short temper, and that the victim had likely said something that set him off.

For his part, Silas admitted getting in a short argument with the deceased, but insisted Timmons was still alive when he left... only to have a rag put over his mouth that somehow caused him to lose consciousness... (Probably chloroform,) Rei thought to herself. Anyway, when he'd woken up, the victim was dead, and Silas had been holding his shotgun like he'd just fired it.

However, as Rei questioned witnesses in the area, they had seemed extremely reluctant to say or confirm anything, forcing the lawyer to use her 'berserk goddess' persona to loosen their lips... and even then, they would only say that maybe some sort of 'chivalrous organization' was involved. It didn't take Rei long to deduce that they were referring to the local mafia, and Timmons' death was likely a mob hit, with Silas set up as the scapegoat. Her suspicions were confirmed when, after looking into the victim's finances, she found that Timmons owed a large amount of money to people with suspected mafia ties.

(As usual, things are never as simple as the prosecution makes them out to be...) Rei shook her head, as she ran a hand through her heather blue hair, before looking up at the clock. (Strange... Mr. Samson should've been back from lunch by now... Did something happen?) The phone then rang, her boss' name appearing on the caller ID. Immediately she picked up, speaking, "Mr. Samson, there you are! I was starting to get worried..."

"Uh, actually, Rei..." Bartholomew answered. "I'm afraid I'm in a bit of trouble..."

"Huh? What happened?" Rei asked. "Did you get in a traffic accident or something?"

"Not that kind of trouble, missy," an unfamiliar male voice answered.

"Wha-? Who is this?!" Rei demanded, standing up.

"Shut up and listen," the sinister voice instructed. "You're the lawyer handlin' the goat farmer's case, right? Well, here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna go and either tell 'im to plead out, or withdraw your case entirely. Soon as he gets found guilty, you get your boss back, capice?"

"And if I don't, my boss goes sleepin' with the fishes?" Rei asked rhetorically.

"You said it, not me," the voice answered. "And don't bother callin' the cops." With that, the line went dead.

Rei hung up the phone, considering her options. Giving in to their demands was out of the question, as far as she was concerned. And while the mafia thug had said not to call the cops, that didn't mean she couldn't call someone else. Going through her case files, she found the number she was looking for, and dialed.

"Hello, Howard Packer?" she greeted. "You know how you said you owed me one when I got you cleared of hacking the Basilicom? Well, I'm calling in that favor. Do you think you can track a recent call made from my boss' cell phone to here...?"

 _August 2, 3:10 PM_

 _Location: ?_

Rei walked up to the reinforced steel door at the end of an alley. (This must be the place,) she thought. She knocked in the pattern that she'd been told by the nearby thug she'd managed to intimidate with her psycho persona. Immediately a slot opened, showing nothing but a pair of eyes.

"What th... Rei Ryghts?!" a deep voice spoke- clearly not the person she'd spoken to over the phone. "What're you doin' here?"

"I'm here to see my boss," the lawyer answered firmly.

The eyes blinked a few times. "Just a moment." The slot closed, and Rei could make out two voices taking on the other side of the door. Then she heard several bolts being thrown, before the door slowly swung open, revealing the owner of the eyes- a big, muscular bald thug dressed in a tacky orange suit, as well as a shorter man, dressed in a black suit with a fedora. "In," the brute gestured.

Rei marched stiffly into the room, seeing another man behind the brute, a thinner, lankier man dressed in a t-shirt and slacks. As the brute closed the door, Fedora turned to the lanky man, ordering, "Search her. And be professional about it."

The lawyer obediantly held out her arms as Lanky checked her, unable to suppress a shudder of disgust as she was patted down, though at least she wasn't touched anywhere inappropriate. "She's clean," Lanky reported.

Fedora nodded, dismissing his comrade with a wave of his hand. "You certainly got balls comin' here by yerself, missy," he spoke up. There was no doubt in Rei's mind now- this was the man she'd spoken to over the phone. "So what's this 'bout comin' to see your boss?"

Rei took a deep breath to calm herself. "As a d-defense attorney, I d-don't take a-anything at face v-value." Swallowing, she continued, "How d-do I know th-that my boss' voice I heard wasn't j-just a recording, and he's already d-dead?"

Fedora frowned at this. "So ya want proof he's still breathin'? ...alright, fair enough. Come this way." As he said this, he grabbed the lawyer by her horn protrusion, pulling her along with him as they marched further into the mob hideout.

"H-hey, easy!" Rei squeaked. "I-I can't walk th-that fast...!" Fedora slowed his pace slightly, allowing the former goddess to walk alongside him better... Soon, they emerged into a large room, where Bartholomew was sitting tied to a chair, guarded by several armed mooks.

"Rei!" the veteran lawyer gasped in surprise. "Why are you here?"

"She wanted to make we were holdin' up our end of the deal," Fedora spoke up as pushed down on Rei's horn, forcing her to kneel. Turning his gaze to the smaller woman, he sneered, "So, you satisfied now, missy?"

Rei just glared coldly at him in response. "Do you have any idea who I am...?"

Fedora just smirked sinisterly. "'Course I know about you. We do our homework, see," he tugged at Rei's horn in a way that caused her to squeak in pain. "We know that the only reason you became a CPU in the first place is because some dark fairy from another dimension gave ya her power... and now that she's gone, you can't transform no more. What, did you think you were gonna intimidate us into lettin' him go? Fat chance, lady!"

"...I see." Rei looked Fedora in the eye. "Well, let me ask you something: Do you know how many clients I've had? ...how many of them have put their faith in me?"

"How many?" Fedora inquired sarcastically.

"Enough... to do THIS!" Rei Ryghts was immediately engulfed in a pillar of light, repulsing Fedora as his hand was burned from the Share energy, causing him to stumble back, his expression shifting to one of pure terror as the light faded, revealing Rei's HDD form.

"R...Rei?" Bartholomew gasped in shock.

"Haaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" the goddess laughed evilly. "So you thought I was powerless, did you! Well I'd say the joke's on *you*, maggot!"

"SHOOT HER!" screamed Fedora as he frantically backed away. The mooks promptly opened fire with their shotguns and assault rifles, only for their shots to be deflected by a large stone shield that suddenly materialized in front of Rei. The goddess then leapt over her shield, swinging her weapon down on the nearest mook's head, knocking him out straight away.

Another mook pointed his gun right at Bartholomew's head. "One move and he dies!" he yelled...

In an instant, the mook was sent flying back into the wall, before slumping over unconscious, Rei now standing where the mook had been, her fist outstretched. "One move is all I needed!" She then kicked another thug in the chin, sending him bouncing off the ceiling, before swinging her weapon around and knocking the assault rifle out of another mook's hands.

"Screw this!" the mook yelled, turning and running. "I'm outta here!"

"You coward!" yelled Fedora, even as he and the remaining thugs retreated a short distance down the hallway. Rei shifted her shield to block off the hallway so they couldn't take any potshots at her or her boss, before moving behind Bartholomew.

"Hold still, boss," she instructed, before bringing her weapon down, smashing the back of the chair he was tied to, allowing the lawyer to wiggle free of his bonds.

"This hallway's the only way outta here!" she heard Fedora's voice from the other side of her stone shield. "As soon as your barrier comes down, yer full of lead!"

The goddess just rolled her eyes at this. "Get behind me, boss," she said to Bartholomew as she held out her hand, an angry red ball of energy forming... Rei then dropped the shield, revealing Fedora and his buddies in kneeling positions, their guns cocked and ready. Their resolve quickly vanished as they saw what Rei had ready for them.

"Good bye, fools!" laughed Rei as she let her attack loose. Fedora and the others just barely managed to dive out of the way as the energy ball rocketed down the hallway, the brute at the entrance also barely managing to jump out of harm's way, as the energy ball collided with the thick steel door, exploding and blowing said door into so much shrapnel. "Just as planned," the goddess chuckled.

Bartholomew wasted no time charging down the hallway, Fedora quickly standing and trying to bring his weapon to bear, only to have the larger man grab the thug and lift him onto his shoulders. "Did I mention I wrestled in high school?!" the lawyer yelled as he began to spin around...

"Nooooooo!" yelled Fedora as he was spun around and around, before being hurled bodily into two other mooks, knocking them all down. The remaining mook trained his shotgun on Bartholomew, only to get knocked down by a flying kick from Rei.

"Boss, get outta here!" she yelled. "I'll cover for you!"

Bartholomew nodded. "Right. Thank you, Rei!" he said as he ran up the hallway to the entrance. The brute was waiting for him, blocking the way out, his teeth gritted. Bartholomew simply lowered his head and charged, tackling the brute in the stomach, yelling a battle cry as he lifted and flipped the brute over his head, the thug landing hard on his back. The lawyer spared a brief glance back at his protege, before turning and running out the destroyed door to freedom. The brute groaned as he slowly opened his eyes...

Seeing HDD Rei standing over him. Immediately his head fell to one side, his tongue hanging out as he played dead.

"A smart one," the CPU chuckled, ignoring him and turning to the remaining mooks. "All right, who's next to get their ass kicked?"

 _August 2, 3:42 PM_

 _Lowee Basilicom_

 _Blanc's Office_

The phone rang, Lowee's CPU briefly glancing at the caller ID before picking up. "Hello, Commissioner... did something happen?" Blanc's eyes went wide as the information was relayed to her, her expression then shifting to 'angry-face' mode.

 **"SHE DID WHAT?!"**

Immediately the office's window exploded, as a very ticked-off White Heart flew off...

"Uh-oh, looks like someone got big sister mad again..." Rom sighed.

"Betcha Neptune did something dumb again," Ram guessed.

 _August 2, 3:45 PM_

 _Outside the Mob Hideout_

White Heart touched down just outside the police tape, reverting to normal before ducking under said tape, marching swiftly towards the object of her ire. The police that saw her swiftly moved out of the way, those that failed to notice were forcibly shoved aside.

As for Rei, she was talking with another officer, her back to Blanc, Bartholomew standing nearby. The veteran lawyer saw the CPU approaching, but was unable to warn Rei before she was grabbed and spun around...

 **"WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!"** Blanc screamed into the bluenette's face.

"Ahhh! I'm sorry! I'm so, so very sorry!" Rei squeaked as tears formed at the corners of her eyes.

"Lady Blanc, please," Bartholomew tried to defuse the situation. "There's no need to yell, the incident's already been resolved..."

"Resolved my ass!" Blanc shot back. "Do you realize what a panic this is going to cause in my nation, when people find out she can use HDD again?!"

"B-but I d-didn't even k-kill anyone!" Rei protested. "Th-they just g-got really b-big boo-boos!" As she said this, two medics walked by, carrying a bandaged, groaning thug on a stretcher. "I was j-just t-trying to save m-my boss...!"

"Which I am quite grateful for," Bartholomew nodded. "Though I admit it was a little disconcerting to see her HDD form up close and personal..."

"Which is exactly the point!" said Blanc. "Everyone's going to be living in fear of Rei Ryghts once again, after most of them thought she was just a harmless lawyer now...!"

"That's what the mafia thought as well," Bartholomew counter-argued. "I certainly don't think they're going to try to abduct me again anytime soon, that much is for certain..."

The CPU just shook her head. "You could have come to me, Rei... I could've kicked their asses just as easily as you did! And with far less potential for panic!"

"B-but you d-don't even l-like me!" Rei pointed out.

"You're right. I don't," Blanc conceded, "but Bartholomew J. Samson is one of the best lawyers in all of Lowee! Like hell I'd just leave him at the mob's mercy!" The larger man actually flushed slightly at this.

Just then, another officer ran up. "Lady Blanc! We just got a call from headquarters!"

"What is it now?" the flat-chested goddess growled.

"The suspected mafia don, Marcus Antonio, has just surrendered himself to the police," the officer reported. "Seems he heard about what happened here and was afraid he was next on Ms. Ryghts' list, so to speak."

"I-I w-wasn't g-going to g-go after him l-like th-that!" Rei protested, her face slightly red. "I would rather h-have e-exposed him i-in c-court..."

"So, you suspected him of setting up the hit on Mr. Timmons?" Bartholomew inquired.

"W-well, he w-was on m-my short list..."

"Actually," the policeman spoke up again, "he confessed to that as well, though he insists it wasn't his idea to frame the goat farmer..."

Blanc heaved a sigh. "Well, I guess that's one major criminal off the streets... I still wish it hadn't happened this way, though." She fixed her gaze on Rei again.

"I-I'll call you next time!" Rei squeaked. "I promise!"

"You'd better," the Lowee CPU insisted.

"Well, if we're all in agreement here," said Bartholomew, standing up, "then Rei and I should get going. We still have to petition for Mr. Cape's release from prison, after all."

"Well, if the court gives you shit over it, just tell them I said they better co-operate," said Blanc.

"Thank you, Lady Blanc, but I don't think that will be necessary," Bartholomew stated. Looking down at Rei again, he elaborated, "After all, unlike Antonio and his subordinates, I'm sure the court system knows better than to mess with the wrong lawyer."

All Rei could do was blush in response, as she and her boss began the long walk back to their office...

~*Fin*~

As always, read and review!


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